Sexy Scala!

Or should I say, Sexy Scala and Kolacny Brothers? What I love about this video is the playfulness, tenderness, and erotic closeness exhibited by most of the couples, as well as the separation and pain demonstrated by the one unhappy couple. The excellent lingerie helps too, of course:

And now, since I know that was rather strikingly low in nudity levels, here's some sexy hardcore to keep you pervs happy - after the jump.

Having Fun With Sex

Yes, I know - sex is erotic, sex is serious stuff, sex is just so damn desirable -- how could I ever laugh at it?

But think about it - is there any other time that you are going to go up to another person and say, "Excuse Sir and/or Madame, would you mind sticking your dingywhilp in my tiddlybop?" Unlikely. In fact, despite sex's elevated status in human civilization, the inherant humor involved in the sexual act has been unable to escape consideration and depiction in popular media. Today's post is about that.

First, I bring you the best condom ad I've ever seen:

Followed by a hilarious take on those other things your grandparents might have used the phone for:

And finally, the sex education I'm not sure I'd want to receive, but certainly hope is out there.

Real Sex Education - The funniest videos are a click away

Femdom Art!

Oh StumbleUpon, how I love you. Today's post is brought to you by the interest "FemDom," and the letter S -- for Sexy, of course. Check out these great examples of erotic art!

Femdom Wrestling Match, by Namio Haukawa, found here.

Elegant Giantess, by Milo Manara, found here.

I love how both of these images are erotic without nudity, and the playfulness with which the figures are rendered. Of course, I also came across some images that are slightly less highbrow:

Interesting how she is both the dominant and still an objectified figure . . . found here.

I absolutely need this paper doll, 100%. Found here.

It's a little overdue, but this one was too cute to resist! Found here.

And then, there was the surprising, slightly jarring, chuckle-inducing and questionably PC image found later in my Stumbling:

Let the cultural sensitivity arguments commence!

On Sunday, Odessa promises some titties, and finally posts some of the sexy sexy story she promised. Kisses!

Dirty, Sexy Learning

Happy New Year everyone! I hope you innaugurated it in your own special way, with plenty of explosions (not just of the firework variety).

Not too much time for a post today, I'm afraid - but I did want to share with you some printed porn con knowledge that I desperately need to have on my boudoir bookshelf:

Available from Amazon.com here, here, here, and here. Or go order them from your local bookstore!

 In this series of books, editor Dian Hanson takes the reader on a journey through the history and social significance of the featured body part, accompanied by sexy sexy pictures spanning decades of pornography and erotica. Of course, the menfolk aren't forgotten:

Double your pleasure here.

Sounds good to me -- buy them for the articles, read them for the pictures . . . or something like that.

Making It Last Longer

Or should I say, finding out that it lasts longer than expected? You may have noticed a lack of sexy story posting last Thursday or yesterday, and I do apologize for the delay. With all the hectic to-dos of the holiday season, this woman's spending more time out of the negligee and on her feet than she'd prefer -- but don't worry, I will get the story up soon; after all, good things come to those who wait.

In the meantime, enjoy this sexy preview of "Timeless" by porn director Kelly Holland. I gotta love a man in uniform.

Porn as Art

There are approximately one-bazillion-times-infinity porn images out there, and I would never imagine that I could actually see even one one-hundredth of what there is out there. What I can do, however, is highlight something that I like when I do see it -- and that's what today's post is about. For me, porn that is particularly artistic is porn that steps away from the everyday images and actions that we're used to seeing and introduces a new twist (or at least attempts to do so; read up on post-modernism if you're confused). In that spirit, I would like to present my favorite images found through Stumbler this morning, along with a little commentary on why I think they deserve notice.

We'll start things off with a little holiday flair - I love how this image connects to the mirror in Van Eyck's Wedding Portrait.

Images become more graphic after the jump, so consider yourself warned.

Sex Myths That Are Kinda True: Married People Don't Have Sex

Actual quote from a party last night:

"You and your husband, when you were dating, had sex at least two, three times a week, right? And now that you're married, the sex becomes less and less of a priority?"

Oh wow, how did Random Guy know? Yes, I'm married, and although I may be what I define as "highly sexual" - or as my husband likes to say in certain situations, "a horny little slut" - my relationship absolutely falls into this stereotype.

One of these couples is not having sex regularly. Hint: it's not the couple with a pet hand.

As my nickname might suggest, we do have sex - but it's more on a once-every-couple-of-weeks schedule than the two-to-three-times-a-week I would prefer. The reason? I suspect adult life.

Yes, when we were dating we were in college -- and even though we both had jobs and classes and homework and social lives, we still didn't have the headache of a full-time job and the upkeep of a house. We were young and full of hormones and capable of going multiple nights in a row without sleep. Now, since slowing metabolisms make going to the gym a necessary habit and savings plans require regular cooking at home, we can easily find ourselves occupied from 6:30am when we wake up for work until 10:30pm when we've cooked, eaten and cleaned up from dinner, put in an hour-long workout, started a load of laundry and taken some time for personal hobbies (hello, blogging). By 10pm, I'm already starting to yawn, and by 11pm I am dragging my butt into bed. Yes, there is that half hour, but that means we both need to have enough energy and determination to actually get around to sexing instead of just half-heartedly fondling each other before rolling over and falling asleep. Don't get me wrong, I find my husband incredibly sexy - but there are some nights when I would rather just lay there and let him do the hard work, while he wants exactly the opposite. Were we to add kids into the mix, I imagine the sex rate would fall faster than Hugh Hefner's dick without Viagra.

"I'm sorry girls, I'm just not up to it tonight."

Thankfully, no matter how closely at times we may seem to resemble it, "married people don't have sex" really is only a stereotype, and stereotypes are regularly broken. When we do get around to having sex -- when there's enough time, and we have enough energy, and there aren't any urgently important things we have to get done instead - the sex is really, really good. No, it's not always earth-shaking-orgasms-that-leave-you-wondering-who-you-were-before-you-felt-that good -- usually, it's more good like homemade-macaroni-and-cheese good, getting-a-scalp-massage good, feeling-warm-and-loved-and-safe good -- but sometimes it is.

For everything else, there's Mastercard.

Tune in Tuesday for Odessa's search for art in the the porn world.